#20. Leave Me Behind

“……Penelope Barshava has been thrown into the prison of the Blue Brick Castle?”

The Duke of Phoenix showed a surprised expression at the unexpected news.

Penelope Barshava was Taran’s guardian and essentially a symbol of the maternal family power supporting the second son of Dragonia.

Though she herself might be insignificant, considering Taran Dragonia, this was by no means a small matter.

His subordinate nodded.

“Yes. Our communication with her has been completely cut off.”

“What happened? Perhaps it’s because of that conflict with her nephew, the second son of Dragonia?”

The Grand Duchy of Dragonia that ruled the Northwest was an extremely closed-off place.

Yet the Duke of Phoenix asked as if he knew exactly what had happened in the main castle of Dragonia like the back of his hand.

“That’s part of it, but……”

“It seems there’s no definite information available.”

“I apologize.”

The Duke of Phoenix gripped tightly the staff said to contain the feather of Phoenix, the divine beast of his family passed down for generations, and thought.

‘What should I do.’

Penelope of Barshava, Taran the second son of Dragonia, the Marquis of Narkia family who were the maternal relatives of the eldest son Siyeref……

The Duke of Phoenix’s complicated mind was filled with one concern.

‘How can I use this situation to strike a blow against Dragonia.’

Phoenix of the Southwest and Dragonia of the Northwest.

The grudge between the two ruling families ran deep.

The two families, which were never on good terms to begin with, became mortal enemies several decades ago when the previous Grand Duke of Dragonia, ‘Partilova,’ massacred the Phoenix ducal family.

Although that disaster allowed him, who had been far down the succession line, to become the current Duke of Phoenix, the prestige of the Phoenix ducal family that had ruled the Southwest was greatly diminished, and their reputation within the Hakan Empire also plummeted.

‘For the immortal Phoenix to be trampled by the likes of Dragonia!’

The primary goal that faced everyone who became the head of Phoenix was the annihilation and execution of Dragonia.

Still, the current Duke of Phoenix was relatively fortunate.

Just the fact that his opponent wasn’t Partilova the Grand Duke, who was called the incarnation of the devil, meant he had a more advantageous start compared to his predecessors.

‘That demon-like woman……’

The Duke of Phoenix involuntarily shuddered as he recalled the devil of Dragonia who had terrified the entire Hakan Empire.

After the previous Grand Duke Partilova disappeared for unclear reasons several decades ago, like many rulers of the Hakan Empire, the Duke of Phoenix also firmly believed that Dragonia would falter.

‘But, who would have known.’

That the man who had been the lowest among Dragonia’s branch families, called ‘Partilova’s dog,’ would return as the new head of the Northwest.

Garet Dragonia.

Dragonia of the Northwest, which was about to fall into chaos due to the previous Grand Duke’s disappearance, united again with his appearance and stood even more firmly without collapsing.

‘So frustratingly.’

Realizing that his master’s mood had deteriorated, the subordinate somehow squeezed out information.

“Ac-According to rumors, they say it’s because of the lady.”

“……lady?”

The Duke of Phoenix, lost in thought, asked absently before realizing.

“Don’t tell me, you’re talking about that half-baked youngest daughter? Her name was definitely……”

Partanie.

He remembered her because she had such a grandiose name despite being essentially an illegitimate child.

‘They say that Garet Dragonia personally brought her in, registered her, and insisted on that grand name.’

The current Grand Duke, Garet Dragonia, had several wives but didn’t particularly favor any of them.

Even when his wives died, he showed no grief beyond formal condolences and immersed himself in work, displaying a heartless nature.

And that cold personality was fully demonstrated toward his children as well.

‘Yet, he showed such care for the lowly youngest daughter whose mother’s identity couldn’t even be revealed.’

People assumed that the Grand Duke had greatly cherished the mother or particularly favored the child.

But it was a misunderstanding.

After bringing the child, the Grand Duke of Dragonia paid no attention to her.

He simply placed her in the Blue Brick Castle without any care or education.

And the lady, brought in with such effort, was merely a fool who couldn’t even resist the lowly Penelope and suffered persecution.

So he had lost interest, and yet……

“Why is that half-wit involved here?”

“According to rumors, the lady was severely injured due to Penelope Barshava’s abuse. The Grand Duke became furious because of that……”

“That’s impossible.”

The Duke of Phoenix frowned.

His subordinate immediately agreed with his master’s denial.

“Yes, I also think it’s a ridiculous rumor, but……”

“However, there must be a reason why such an absurd rumor has emerged.”

“Pardon?”

The Duke of Phoenix thought as his eyes gleamed, growing redder closer to the pupil.

If, by any chance, the youngest lady was truly Garet Dragonia’s weakness……

“Send someone.”

For now, Penelope Barshava shouldn’t be left to die.

* * *

She dreamed.

A nightmare of returning to that foolish Partanie who was starved for affection, who would do anything just to be loved and acknowledged by her father and brothers……

And then freezing to death while being persecuted and starving among people.

‘What a terrible dream.’

Immersed in warm water, she thought.

Coldly speaking, perhaps that would have been better.

Because living longer would have only meant a painful and miserable life with a time limit.

‘Death or life, you speak of those things so easily.’

The moment she recalled death in the snow field, the voice that had torn her heart to pieces echoed in her ears.

‘Is that what a child of Dragonia should do?’

As the water surface rippled, warmth began to escape from her fingers.

Left alone, she curled up and trembled.

She felt cold.

It was as if she had fallen back onto that snow field, facing her father’s cold gaze.

That’s when it happened.

“……tanie!”

The same voice that had once rebuked her was heard.

‘Father?’

……No way.

She doubted.

She couldn’t be sure if it was truly the voice of her father, the Grand Duke of Dragonia.

Her muffled ears couldn’t hear properly, and his voice had always been cold and emotionless.

It had never wavered like this.

Not even once.

She seemed to hear distant sounds of relief — you’ve woken up, you didn’t die.

As her blurry vision gradually cleared, the faces she had seen countless times in her previous life became distinct.

“Partanie!”

Ah.

She could no longer deny it.

Her father’s firm jawline and tight lips, which she had always secretly observed and still remembered, were imprinted in her eyes.

With a hazy mind, looking at the figures before her, she thought.

She knew that voice.

She had seen that face before……

With that realization, the bone-chilling cold, the endless snow field, the pain squeezing her heart, and the black blood spewing from her mouth all vividly came back as if they had happened just yesterday.

And that miserable hallucination right before death.

The faces of family members who seemed worried, concerned, and regretful about her facing death.

That false illusion was unfolding before her again.

‘No, that was a dream.’

I’m already dead, aren’t I? It’s just a hallucination.

Though her hazy reason was skeptical, something welled up from her stomach first.

‘Why are you doing this now.’

Her wet eyes burned hot, and she felt like she might burst into tears.

‘You’ll just go to Fiona Phoenix anyway.’

Why on earth.

Why had they appeared before her again, just like back then?

‘Because that moment was the greatest regret of my life?’

Even after being reincarnated into a completely different world, receiving the new name Yeon Bora, and living a second life, she couldn’t forget the wretchedness and helplessness of being abandoned by her family.

She had somehow forged her own life. She made friends and colleagues, treated patients, and built wealth, fame, and social status.

‘But that was it, I ultimately lived all alone.’

A life where no one loved her and she loved no one.

A lonely and solitary life where she outwardly smiled at people but inwardly trusted no one.

Sometimes she wondered.

Would it have been better not to have memories of her previous life?

Would a life where she was foolishly used and abandoned, but still lived brightly with hope of being loved someday, have been happier?

‘I don’t know.’

But one thing was certain.

She could never live like that again.

She could no longer be that fool who believed in and yearned for the miracle of love, throwing herself away just for that.

She wanted to blink her eyes, but her frozen body wouldn’t move as she wished.

“Ah……”

The ice-blue irises unique to Dragonia filled her vision.

Those cruelly blue eyes.

The very eyes she never had, and therefore always longed to reach, were now gazing at her.

With only her fully reflected in them.

“Fa, ther……?”

The small voice that escaped was like the wheezing of a dying baby bird.

Her body was too heavy and she had no strength at all. Even the slightest movement was extremely difficult. Her dry throat cracked and hurt.

So she said no more.

She couldn’t speak.

Through her blurry vision, the ice-cold eyes multiplied into several pairs.

Her father and brothers whom she had so desperately wanted to be loved by.

‘I never wanted to see you again.’

Not even in dreams.

She thought it was fortunate that she had died early.

That way, at least, she had wanted to leave them behind.

So, please……

“Leave me, behind.”

Before she dies with a time limit again.