Chapter 25. Disappointment and Fluttering

“Umm…… it just happened that way.”

Rasiel blinked as she answered.

The form of address that she had adopted without time to feel strange or awkward, swept along by circumstances, had somehow been organized with Michaela’s permission.

So this was the best answer Rasiel could give him.

“It’s strange. The twins are your brothers, but I’m ‘Young Duke.’ My sister would be disappointed too.”

Rapellian dragged Michaela into this because he felt his statement made him seem quite petty.

A faint embarrassment appeared in his eyes, which had always remained dry and emotionless.

Nevertheless, he didn’t withdraw his opinion.

After all, discrimination was disappointing regardless of age or status.

Rasiel was struck by the word “disappointed” that came from his mouth.

‘Ah, did that apply to the Duchess and Young Duke back then too?’

Apart from the whirlwind process that had left no time to think, Michaela and Rapellian hadn’t specified how they wanted to be addressed, so she hadn’t considered this.

‘I chose what seemed least disrespectful, but it could be disappointing.’

After some deliberation, Rasiel asked with a slightly troubled and apologetic expression.

“Then…… what should I call you?”

“You could call my sister ‘Unnie.'”

“Wouldn’t that be disrespectful?”

“She’s probably secretly waiting for it. The day you call her ‘Unnie,’ she might even give you this ducal residence.”

“N-no way.”

“She’s always regretted not having a younger sister. Though she adores us dearly, she was quite disappointed that even Riello turned out to be a boy.”

He uncrossed his legs and picked up a glass of fresh fruit juice as he recalled a distant memory.

“If it’s not disrespectful, I’ll try calling her ‘Unnie.’ Then for the Young Duke……”

“You could…… call me ‘Oppa.'”

“O……o……”

Rasiel, who had stopped eating her snack, looked at him and fidgeted with her vibrant lips. But for some reason, that simple word “Oppa” wouldn’t come out easily.

It felt as if someone was forcefully pulling back the word trying to escape her throat, preventing it from coming out.

Rasiel fumbled for quite some time, unable to produce the proper word.

“If it’s difficult, you don’t have to……”

“O……ppa?”

Before Rapellian could properly dissuade her, Rasiel called him with what sounded like genuine struggle.

She was practically sweating from the effort of extracting the word that seemed stuck in her throat, spinning round and round.

After painfully spitting out the awkward word, Rasiel wiped the sweat that had seeped into her hands by rubbing them on her skirt.

It was strange that she had called Briel and Riello without much resistance.

“Ah.”

Rapellian froze at the word that had painfully escaped her lips.

His heart felt like it had dropped to the floor with a thud. It wasn’t because he was excited or thrilled to hear a form of address he never expected to hear in his lifetime.

‘What is this?’

Rapellian had thought he was disappointed about not being called “Orabeoni,” but now that he was actually called by a similar term, it felt strangely uncomfortable, as if he had heard something he shouldn’t have.

To hide the bewilderment that had overcome him, leaving him no room to retreat, he brushed his hand over his mouth and rose from the couch.

‘Is this really so uncomfortable? Perhaps if I keep hearing it…… No. I’d rather be called by my name.’

Rapellian was so flustered by this situation that he felt dizzy. At present, he couldn’t imagine living with Rasiel calling him “Oppa.”

Though he wondered ‘What’s the big deal?!’, there was nothing he could do about it right now.

He unbuttoned his shirt collar, which suddenly felt suffocating, and headed to his desk.

Feigning composure as he sat in his chair, he spoke with a deliberately calm attitude.

“If it’s awkward, you don’t need to force yourself. We haven’t lived together that long, so I spoke thoughtlessly. Just do what feels comfortable.”

Rapellian knew it was cowardly to make such excuses.

However, despite feeling guilty about his conscience, he couldn’t openly express his discomfort because of the truth spinning around in his mouth.

‘If I speak honestly, it would hurt her feelings.’

How hurtful would it be if, after asking her to try calling him that, he said it didn’t feel good when she actually did?

Rapellian chose to remain somewhat cowardly, at least toward himself.

Born with no need to consider others’ feelings and usually proceeding without hesitation in all matters, he now found himself considering Rasiel’s feelings.

Unaware of his inner thoughts, Rasiel completely fell for Rapellian’s act and felt greatly relieved.

“Oh, really?”

Rasiel had managed to force herself to call him once, but she strongly felt she couldn’t do it a second time.

The moment had been so difficult that she had even briefly considered ‘Should I run away whenever I see Rapellian?’

So it was fortunate that he had stepped in like this.

“Of course. Your comfort is most important.”

“Then I’ll call you that when I become more familiar with it. Actually, it’s a bit awkward……”

Though she tried not to show it, the relief of thinking ‘I’m saved’ was evident in her expression as she responded to his words.

Seeing Rasiel’s expression become much more comfortable, unlike when she had struggled to say “Oppa,” Rapellian felt this was enough.

‘She doesn’t seem to misinterpret my intentions, and Rasiel wasn’t hurt by what I started and caused, so that’s fortunate.’

He relaxed and emphasized again with a cool face as if nothing had happened.

“Your comfort should always be the top priority.”

“Yes. Thank you. And I’m sorry.”

“I should apologize for saying something unnecessary. No need for you to apologize. By the way, if you’re alone until dinner, you can stay here.”

Deliberately changing the subject, Rapellian pointed to a bookshelf located in the corner of the wall.

There were picture books that could be enjoyed even without knowing how to read.

“Oh? Can I really stay here? I might disturb you.”

“That’s why my sister sent you to me.”

“That’s true, but……”

Rasiel trailed off, fidgeting with her fingertips.

A brief interruption could be seen as a refreshing break, but she worried that staying together continuously might be an inconvenience.

However, contrary to Rasiel’s concerns, Rapellian didn’t seem to think that way at all.

“You can run around and roll around here if you want, so feel comfortable.”

Rapellian smiled slightly and reopened the documents he had been looking at earlier.

Encouraged by his composure, Rasiel lightly moved her steps.

She took a picture book from the wooden bookshelf and turned the pages one by one.

Then, suddenly remembering something, Rasiel approached his desk and stood in front of it.

“What is it?”

“Will I ever be able to learn how to read and write?”

At Rasiel’s question, Rapellian put down his fountain pen and interlaced his fingers.

Not immediately answering her question, he seemed lost in thought for a moment before taking out an empty notebook and a fountain pen from the desk drawer and beckoning to Rasiel.

“Come here.”

Rasiel went around the desk and stood beside him.

“Sit here.”

Rapellian offered his seat to Rasiel.

The chair, adjusted for Rapellian’s build, was quite high for Rasiel.

Feeling self-conscious about her feet that didn’t reach the floor, Rasiel crossed them once and then uncrossed them.

“I postponed it for a while thinking you wouldn’t have the mental space for it, but you’ll soon have a tutor.”

“A tutor? For me? Why?”

“How could we leave a member of our household without education?”

“Oh……”

Rasiel was dumbfounded by his matter-of-fact response.

She had asked thinking she might be able to learn basic letters, but a tutor?

Already receiving so much, the thought that she would now formally be able to study felt too generous to express.

Yet, despite feeling dazed and burdened, Rasiel felt more excited than when receiving clothes or shoes. If she had to choose just one thing, she would choose education, even if it meant returning everything else.

“Why, don’t you like it?”

“No, no. I’ll study really hard.”

Rasiel quickly denied this and showed her determination with strength in her eyes.

Even though he had merely mentioned that she would have a tutor, seeing Rasiel so happy made Rapellian feel good too.

He even felt proud, as if he had done something incredibly wonderful.

“Until then, I’ll teach you the basic letters. Come here at this time starting tomorrow.”

Rapellian said with a bright smile.

Momentarily distracted by his smoothly curved eyes, Rasiel nodded her head vigorously a beat late.

“I’ll definitely come!”

Satisfied with her enthusiastic response, Rapellian opened the notebook and began writing down the basic letters of the imperial language.

Thus began their letter-learning sessions.

Rasiel awkwardly held the fountain pen and wrote crooked letters.

Shapes that could hardly be called letters continued messily across the notebook.

“I guess I don’t have a talent for this. Your handwriting is so pretty, Young Duke……”

Rasiel became discouraged as the letters didn’t come out as she intended.

“Shall I help you?”

She didn’t refuse his offer, unlike with other things.

Rasiel quickly nodded in response.

“Yes, please help me. I want to write well quickly.”

Rapellian, just as he had once done with the twins, placed his left arm around Rasiel’s back and overlapped his right hand on hers holding the fountain pen.

“Ah.”

Rasiel’s thoughts momentarily stopped as his warmth approached, gently embracing her shoulders.

Then, as his hand overlapped the back of hers, her heart suddenly began to pound rapidly and intensely.

“This part goes like this.”

He guided Rasiel’s hand, oblivious to her reaction.

The crooked shapes gradually formed proper letter-like forms.

However, Rasiel couldn’t think of anything.

Her heart was beating so rapidly that she couldn’t concentrate on writing at all.

‘Why is my heart beating so fast?’

Rasiel tried her best to calm her pounding heart and focus on his voice. But the more she tried, the more aware she became of everything about him.

Especially fatal was his voice, softly resonating near her right ear.

“This fountain pen is a bit thick for you. I’ll prepare one that fits your hand. Please bear with it for now.”

“Ah, yes, yes.”

“Hmm…… perhaps it would be better to start with a pencil for now?”

“Y-yes, a pencil would be good too.”

“Whether it’s a pencil or a fountain pen, once your hand develops strength and you get the hang of writing, you’ll be able to write comfortably soon.”

Intending to boost her morale, Rapellian patted the back of Rasiel’s head and straightened his posture from the lowered position.

As the warm temperature that had been touching her moved away, Rasiel finally seemed to see the writing they had done together.

“I-I’ll practice hard.”

“Take your time. There’s no need to rush.”

“I want to write beautifully quickly, and I want to read soon too.”

“Aserion’s letters aren’t difficult, so you’ll learn them quickly. Don’t worry.”

Rapellian didn’t spare his praise and stroked Rasiel’s head once more.

Rasiel blushed slightly on both cheeks and smiled shyly.

Her heart still fluttering.